VD Day 2013

Getting Along with Co-Workers to the Nth Degree

Dating at Work

Just in time for Valentine’s Day, CareerBuilder.com has released a November 2012 Harris Interactive poll about dating in the workplace. It turns out lots of workers are playing footsy around their cubicles. They are "getting along" to an extreme degree! Among the more than 4,000 worker respondents, nearly 4 in 10 reported they had dated a co-worker at some point in their career.

In most cases, the survey revealed, co-workers dated peers. However, 3 In 10 indicated they had dated the boss or someone else in the office hierarchy.

HR professionals everywhere, who have had more than enough to worry about during the years that have followed the Great Recession, surely must be shaking their heads everywhere. They know that love relationships in the office can end in disaster, wreak havoc on office morale, and in the worst of all cases, lead to sexual harassment claims.   

For those reasons, I’ve always recommended that new professionals avoid relationships at work. I also know something about hormones and realize a good portion of workers will opt to ignore my brilliant advice.

If you decide to pursue that special someone at work, keep the following in mind:

Avoid public displays of affection in the workplace. That means no hand-holding, no playing kissy-face, and no touching of any body part that tends to be highlighted in an MTV video.

Avoid communicating romantic messages via office email. Technically, your employer owns anything you write on an office computer, laptop or smart phone. If you’re determined to be an office Romeo or Juliet, use a personal email account to send your sonnets.

Really, really try to control any urge you may have to date the boss. Once the relationship is revealed—and trust me, it will be revealed—no matter how talented you are, your co-workers will assume that any promotion or perks you've received have been related to your relationship rather than your performance. Should the relationship fail, you may discover new roadblocks to career growth opportunities.

What Do You Need to Know?

Dating a co-worker is tricky. If you can avoid it, do. And don't even think about dating your boss.
 

Related Things You Need to Know

Developing Allies at Every Level

Allyship may be the “missing link” that can help organizations ensure inclusion actually occurs.

When You Need to Get to "Yes"

Because of covid-19, many employers will have a unique opportunity to discern how well their summer hires manage conflict. My contacts indicate that this year’s summer associates and interns have been assigned to group projects. Disagreements are inevitable when any team goes through the process of forming, storming, norming and performing. Additionally, since most summer hires will work from home, they will need to negotiate with family members or roommates over who gets access to the best printer, the extent to which background noise needs to be minimized during Zoom calls, and who and when someone can just walk into their workspace for a quick chat.

Proving You're a Professional During a Shortened Summer Program

Because so many summer associate and internship programs have been significantly curtailed, the students who will participate in these shortened programs must avoid unforced errors. Like never before, summer hires will have very few opportunities to demonstrate their capabilities. How they handle one or two assignments will create critically important impressions.

Learn More

Order Mary'sbooksto learn the 100 things interns, new hires and summer associates need to know to succeed.

Let Mary Know

Do you have questions or want to see Mary speak at your school/employment? Reach out to Mary for more info.

Contact Mary